Fear.
It’s that nagging voice in the back of your head that creeps into every decision, big or small. For many of us, it’s an ever-present companion, quietly steering the course of our lives without us even realizing it.
I know this because, for much of my life, fear was my constant shadow. But here’s what I’ve learned: freedom is on the other side of fear.
The Impact of My Fear
My story starts when I was five years old. I had a ruptured hernia that required surgery. I don’t remember much about that day, but I do remember waking up mid-operation—unable to scream, unable to move.
That moment of terror left a lasting mark.
When I came out of the hospital, something was different. I had developed a severe speech impediment, a stutter that shaped my identity and every decision I made.
Overnight, I became introverted, shy, and riddled with self-doubt.
What’s worse, this stutter planted a seed of fear that grew into a towering presence in my life. Fear dictated everything.
It stopped me from pursuing opportunities, from stepping out of my comfort zone, and from living the life I envisioned for myself.
How Fear Shapes Our Decisions
Fear isn’t always loud. Sometimes, it whispers in the form of excuses.
In eighth grade, I loved football. I dreamed of playing in the NFL. But when high school football camp rolled around, fear whispered, “You don’t have to go the first day. You can start later.” That “later” never came.
Fear won.
Over the years, fear continued to weave itself into my decisions. Whether it was avoiding speech class in high school or convincing myself I wasn’t good enough to pursue my dreams, fear kept me stuck.
The Turning Point
It wasn’t until college that I was forced to confront my biggest fear: public speaking.
A professor refused to let me skip the speech requirement despite my stutter. At that moment, I felt like I was standing face-to-face with a monster.
I can still remember the humiliation of standing in front of the class, my words stuck in my throat, my face contorted as I tried to push them out.
It was so…embarrassing. I just felt pathetic.
The audience looked away, unable to meet my eyes. It was one of the most painful moments of my life.
But then something incredible happened.
Driving home after that experience, I turned on the radio, and a song blared through the speakers: “You can’t keep a good man down.”
It was like a lightning bolt of clarity struck me. In that moment, I realized I had a choice: I could let fear continue to control my life, or I could confront it head-on.
Freedom Is on the Other Side of Fear
That day, I decided to stop letting fear make my decisions. I chose to embrace fear, to harness it as a source of energy rather than a barrier. Here’s what I’ve learned since:
Fear is energy. When you feel fear, it’s a signal that you’re on the edge of growth. Lean into it.
Fear doesn’t disappear. The goal isn’t to eliminate fear but to act in spite of it.
Freedom comes through action. Every time you push through fear, you expand your comfort zone and gain more clarity, confidence, and control over your life.
Fear can paralyze us, but it can also propel us forward.
When we choose to confront it, we gain clarity. We start to see what’s truly important, what’s worth fighting for, and what’s holding us back.
For me, fear became my teacher. It taught me resilience, self-belief, and the power of vulnerability. The very thing I once saw as my greatest weakness—my speech impediment—turned out to be one of my greatest gifts.
It forced me to grow, to push past my limits, and to connect with others on a deeper level.
The Opposite of Fear Is Freedom
Many of us chase happiness, love, or success, thinking these things will bring us fulfillment.
But here’s the truth: happiness and love aren’t destinations—they’re byproducts. They come when we pursue freedom in all areas of our lives: our health, our relationships, our work, and our purpose.
Fear is the gatekeeper to that freedom. The more we confront it, the closer we get to the life we truly want.
What’s on the Other Side for You?
I share this story because I know how easy it is to let fear win. But I also know what’s possible when you stop letting it make your decisions.
Freedom is on the other side. Whether it’s starting a business, having a difficult conversation, or chasing a dream, the things you want most are waiting for you beyond that initial discomfort.
So ask yourself: What decision have I been avoiding because of fear? Then take one small step toward it. You’ll be amazed at what happens when you stop running from angst and start running toward freedom.
Taking the step alone can be overwhelming and scary. If you’re searching for a community of people ready to rally around you and offer support, download the Freedomology app and join us!
The Tribe would be thrilled to have you, see you there!
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